i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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