My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
