6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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