Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Randomize
