Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
