matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
