this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I haven't been this sober since birth.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
