Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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