My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize