Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
