So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
