I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
