I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
ttyl tear gas
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
