Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
