is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
