I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
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