Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
