you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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