my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Houston, we have a blender
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
