How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
