Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
