I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
