marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
