I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
