nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
