11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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