matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I didn't notice because vodka
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
