It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize