they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
