Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
