You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
