I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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