Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize