Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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