I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
