THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
