Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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