margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize