Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
