Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
