Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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