dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
