That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize