So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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