I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
