I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
