We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
The best revenge is premature balding
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
