Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
