yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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