whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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