It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Randomize