I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
