I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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