New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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